Surviving

We're surviving. Sadly, we've been through this many times before. But this time, it seems to hurt the most perhaps because we went to the top fertility clinic in America and still ended up with a BFN. But I can say that I have no regrets going to CCRM. I have nothing negative to say about my doctor nor the nurses and staff. They have been exceptional.

I'm trying to remember that no matter how unbearable it feels right now, I won't feel like this (with this intensity) forever. And if I stay in each moment, I find that grief ebbs and flows, so that in between feeling like I want to die, I also have moments that don't quite hurt so much...when I can breathe a little.

Today is the focus. It's the only place we can be. Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow will sort itself out.

I'd like to thank all of you for your responses, phone calls, and emails. I appreciate your support, well wishes, and prayers.