Surviving

We're surviving. Sadly, we've been through this many times before. But this time, it seems to hurt the most perhaps because we went to the top fertility clinic in America and still ended up with a BFN. But I can say that I have no regrets going to CCRM. I have nothing negative to say about my doctor nor the nurses and staff. They have been exceptional.

I'm trying to remember that no matter how unbearable it feels right now, I won't feel like this (with this intensity) forever. And if I stay in each moment, I find that grief ebbs and flows, so that in between feeling like I want to die, I also have moments that don't quite hurt so much...when I can breathe a little.

Today is the focus. It's the only place we can be. Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow will sort itself out.

I'd like to thank all of you for your responses, phone calls, and emails. I appreciate your support, well wishes, and prayers.

No words

Last night, we received the most heartfelt phone call; and it was from Jerry's boss' wife, Soo. She is extremely nice, one of those people that anyone would be blessed to know. Soo called last night after Jerry sent an email to his boss and told him the news. They've been one of the people giving us support from the beginning. The phone call started like a regular phone call, and then towards the end of the conversation I heard Jerry get choked up a little. I asked Jerry what she said and he told me, "Now why can't we get support from our parents like that?" I told him that my mom is just an overprotective mother hen, and that she never filters what she says. What she's thinking is what comes out of her mouth, even if it's way hurtful. Jerry's mom, on the other hand, well.. I don't know. We haven't heard from her; she rarely calls us anyway. There's never an in-between of the two extremes.

Anyway... back to what Soo said on the phone. She told Jerry that we're really special to her; she even calls us family. And then she told Jerry to be there for me, be strong. She also told Jerry that she is really proud of me and wished that I was her daughter. She even wished that she could pop one out and give the baby to us. And all through the conversations, Jerry told me that she was crying. But that's not what choked him up. What choked him up was what she said.

Seriously, how does one move on from this? In the back of my mind, I know that we have 2 frozen embryos. That's potentially two children. But how can I get my heart to stop hurting so bad to even think about going on?

Beta results

BFN.

8dp5dt

So I caved in a did the First Response urine pregnancy test. One line. BFN. Again, that's IVF lingo for big friggin' negative. I did the test right before Mass. I didn't have the heart to tell Jerry, as I didn't want him to feel the same way I feel before church and all through church.

After Mass, as we were walking into Albertsons, I told him. His face just sunk. We were quiet during the whole grocery shopping, each in our own world letting it sink in and deal.

I feel like I'm in a daze. We've just tabbed up the money spent on trying to have a baby (starting with the first IUI back in 1999), and we've just crested the $100,000 mark (we're 100% out-of-pocket).

We are toying with the idea of moving to Denver to get a fresh start. Don't get me wrong. I love our house. I designed it from scratch, and I put my heart and soul into this place. But maybe we need a change of scenery, a new perspective? I wish we could keep this house AND have one in Denver. But we have bills to pay. Know anyone who wants to buy a house?

* cul-de-sac, 1/4 acre lot in a recorded subdivision w/ homeowner's association
* custom built in 1996
* 2,000 sq. ft. brick house on concrete slab
* 2 car garage
* 4/2
* 2x6 walls
* air conditioning system where if you run the air, it'll heat the water so rarely use the hot water heater to have hot water
* 9 ft. ceilings in all rooms, except 12 ft. cathedral in living room, kitchen, and dining room
* Marble wood-burning fireplace
* Brazillian cherrywood in living room and hallways
* Oak hardwood(mosaic pattern in bedrooms)
* new shatter-proof low-e/argon Pella casement windows, 9 lite prairie design, wood casings
* All windows have custom vertical blinds with center split
* Mstr bathroom: travertine tile floors & shower, quartz countertops, cherrywood cabinets, Kohler porcelain sinks, Delta 3 piece faucets, Hansgrohe shower head, garden tub w/ wide stream faucet, separate commode room w/pocket door plus Kohler one-piece toilet, octagonal window in commode room
* 2nd bath: travertine tile floors, quartz countertops, cherrywood cabinets, Kohler porcelain sinks, Delta 3 piece faucets, shower/tub combo, Kohler one-piece toilet, octagonal window
* 8 ft. all-wood French backdoor (Pella) with in-between glass cellular blinds and multi-point lock door handles
* Baldwin lever exterior/interior door handles
* Soffit lights outside
* Gutters w/gutter guards
* sprinkler system with 100% yard coverage
* professionally landscaped yard

We're not greedy. Some money leftover for a downpayment on a new house in Denver would be nice but not necessary.

Nothing is for sure until the beta tomorrow. Maybe the urine test is wrong (hey, it can happen - but it has never happened to me). We're trying to hold out hope, but it is so hard when all we've known is disappointment. I hate this infertility rollercoaster ride from hell. I don't want to ride it anymore. I'm emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausted. I just want to get the blood test over and done with so we can figure out where to go from there. I'm still going to keep taking my meds until they tell me not to. We still have 2 frozen embryos in Denver, and that'll probably be the first thing we do. But we'll have to talk with the doctor first and see what he recommends. He might recommend that we do another fresh cycle and add the frozen embryos with that. I don't know. I'll post the reults of my beta tomorrow.

4dp5dt

So I'm 4 days past a 5 day transfer today. Implantation, if it were going to occur, should've already happened. I'm hoping and praying that our 2 embryos have settled in nicely and will stay there for the next 9 months. I so want to do a hpt (home pregnancy test), but I know it's too early now. I belong to an IVF board, and the ladies there have gotten positive hpt's as early as 5dpt (5 days past transfer). That would be tomorrow for me. I've tried talking Jerry into doing a hpt tomorrow morning before we leave, but he refuses. He says what if it's negative, we'd be depressed all the way home. And it could be a false negative, so we'd be depressed for nothing. But I'm so anxious.

I know I'm impatient - but you have to understand - I've been waiting almost 15 years!!

I'm not having any of the "symptoms" (period-like cramping) I had with my last 2 embryo transfers although they were done in Pensacola and those cycles were the frozen embryo cycles with unexpanded embryos. So those symptoms don't count in my book.

I am usually not a nap person, but ever since Saturday I've taken naps every day around 2pm for like an hour or so. Also, I've been feeling a bit dizzy at times. Are those pregnancy symptoms or just the side effects of the progesterone suppositories and the estrogen patches and pills? I'm not having period-like cramping although the nurse did tell me that some women do experience that. I guess right now, I'm just looking for ANY symptom.

I told Jerry that I want to do a hpt this Saturday, but he's still hesitant. We'll see. I've been told by the other women on the IVF boards that First Response is the most sensitive, so that's the one I'm going to use.

Jerry said that he's so not looking forward to going home only because of the weather there in Pensacola. He said that he may just put a FORE SALE sign on the front lawn after he mows it Saturday. I joked around with him saying that if he doesn't stroke out first. He's gotten so used to the weather here, and acts so shocked when the people here say it's so hot. He said he'd take this kind of hot over Pensacola hot anyday. He's not the only one. I totally love the weather here as well. Plus there are so many things to do here. I'll post about that in another blog. But right now, I am obsessing about whether or not I'm pregnant or not.

I'm 3dp5dt today!

Yep. For those that aren't familiar with IVF lingo, I'm 3 days past a 5 day transfer.

The doctor called me Saturday morning and asked if we could go in a bit earlier because the genetic results are back. He also said to be thinking on the way to the clinic as to how many embryos - two or three - to transfer.

When we got to the clinic, we were brought up to the second floor waiting area. A nurse came right out to bring us back behind the double doors into an embryo transfer room. She took my temp and my vitals. She also explained to us the do-s and don't-s after embryo transfer. Then she said that she would be right back with a valium for me to take. I was hesitant, so she explained what it's for - to relax me and my uterus. So I agreed to take it.

Then a phlebotomist came in and took my blood. Once again, one prick and done. She explained that the doctor wants my baseline hormone levels.

Then the doctor came in and asked me how I was feeling. When I told him that I felt great, he gave me a high-five! He then asked us if we've decided how many embryos we wanted transferred. We asked him the qualities of the 7 fresh embryos, and he said that he'll get the paper with the results. He came back in a few minutes later, and he said that 2 embryos were AA quality, meaning that they're the highest grade the embryos can get. He said that the other 5 embryos were so-so quality, one BB and the others lower quality. We asked him what are the chances of triplets if we transferred the 2 AA quality embryos and the one BB quality embryo. He said that given my age and fertility (he said that I was VERY fertile), the chance of triplets is roughly 20% for me. Well, 20% is too high of a percentage for me, as I am afraid to have triplets - too many complications and I want the babies to have the best chance. So we said we'd just transfer the 2 AA quality embryos. The doctor said, "Good choice" and left. I assume he left to tell the embryologist how many embryos to bring to the room.

Then the embryologist came in and brought in his equipment. The equipment looked like a premie baby incubator, except inside had a microscope and stuff. There were two holes with doors that the embryologist sticks his hands through to get the embryos. Jerry wanted to take a picture with his camera phone, but he didn't want the flash to bother the embryos. The lights in the room were very dim.

The doctor came back in and got me ready to receive the embryos. It was like being at my GYN's office getting a pap, except the ultrasonographer was there pressing with the ultrasound want on my very full bladder. The whole process was a bit uncomfortable, but I just went to my happy place. Then I saw the embryologist remove a long thin straw that had the embryos in it and hand it to the doctor. He explained what he did every step of the way. I felt a little twinge, like something pushing past my cervix. Jerry got to look at the ultrasound screen the whole time and saw the embryos being injected into my uterus. This is his 3rd time seeing this, so he sort of knows what to look for. Then it was over. The whole process took like 15 minutes.

Then the nurse inverted the bed, where my head was lower than my feet. And she said that she'll be back in 15 minutes to see if I need to use the bedpan. Both the doctor and the embryologist wished us luck and left. So it was just me and Jerry in the room.

Then 15 minutes later, the nurse came in and asked me if I needed to use the bedpan. I was so embarassed to use it, but I knew if I didn't I'd explode. She got me set up and told Jerry to push the red button when I was done. Then she left me to my business. I was very embarassed, especially with Jerry looking at me. So I told him not to look at me. So he took out his cell phone and was fiddling with that. Then I told him I was done and he pushed the red button. The nurse came in and got me all fixed up. And asked me if I needed more warm blankets. She was very professional about all of this. I know people use bedpans all the time at this clinic, but still I was very embarassed.

Then the embrylogist came back in and told us in further detail about our embryos that we didn't transfer. He said that the 5 other fresh embryos weren't that good of a grade so he's going to let them grow another day to see. Then he would freeze the ones that were "good" and would call us on Monday to let us know how many he froze.

Then he told us about the 5 frozen embryos that we had shipped here from Pensacola. He said that when he thawed them, one of them immediately was dead. Another one died within the hour. And the third one died shortly after that. So two out of the five survived the thaw. The ones that survived, he had biopsied and sent for genetic testing. The genetic tests came back as 1 out of the 2 being normal, meaning not having an unbalanced Robertsonian translocation. So there you have it. The Pensacola fertility doctor messed up, and we now have proof. Anyway...

We stayed there for about an hour, and I had to use the potty. So the nurse accompanied me to the bathroom and told me when I was done that there would be a wheelchair waiting for me. So I got changed and did my business in the potty, and she wheeled me out of the clinic where Jerry had already pulled up with the Yukon. I stretched out horizontally in the back seat for the ride back to the hotel.

So I've been on complete bed rest ever since Saturday afternoon. That's why I haven't had the chance to post an update. Today, I'm allowed to get up and sit up a bit. I can do more and more each day, but I'm not supposed to do anything strenuous, including exercise or even picking up Buttercup.

On Monday, we received the call from the embryologist saying that out of the 5 fresh embryos that we didn't transfer, only 1 was good enough to freeze. We were a bit sad about the news. The one that he did freeze isn't that good of a quality though. So as of now, we have two embryos that are frozen here in Denver. One is from this fresh IVF cycle. The other is from the IVF cycle in Pensacola - not as good quality as the two that were transferred to my uterus.

My beta (blood pregnancy test) is July 28th. Pray for us! I'm hoping we have twins!!

Update!

So the nurse called me this afternoon just like the embryologist said this morning. I really like it when someone says they'll do something, they actually do it. Anyway...

My embryo transfer date is set for this Saturday. I have to be at the clinic at noon for a 1pm embryo transfer. However, the nurse said that we may have a 2pm embryo transfer depending on if we have to wait for the genetic test results.

I am to take 1 Prometrium at 7am on Saturday. I can't wear any perfumes or lotions. I am supposed to have a partially full bladder, so I need to bring a bottled water. The nurse will tell me when to start drinking.

After the embryo transfer, I will have to be on complete bedrest until Monday, only going up to go potty. We are going to stay in Denver for a few more days just to make sure. So we won't leave here until Thursday. We will stay overnight in Dallas Thursday night. And then be in Pensacola Friday night. Yay!

I can't wait for the results of the genetic tests. Going by what the embryologist said today, we have a good solid 20 embryos to work with. It would be a bonus for us if the 3 embryos that are at 4 cells today start catching up. Because 65% of the sperm have the genetic defect, we're looking at roughly 33% of these embryos to be normal. So let's say we have 20 embryos. Roughly 7 of them should be normal. It'd be great if there are more, but by playing the odds and statistics we figured on 7. So when you think about it, I really needed to have that many eggs to begin with - just to compensate for the genetic defect. I've had people ask me why we needed so many eggs to begin with, and now you know why.

Day 3 embryo report!

The embryologist just called and gave us an update on how our embryos are progressing. Today is Day 3. He said that all the embryos are "developing beautifully." All 23 embryos divided. He'd like to see more than 6 cells.
Here is the report:

1. There are 3 embryos that are just at 4 cells.
2. There is 1 embryo that have 7 cells.
3. There is one embryo that have 10 cells.
4. The rest of the embryos have 8 cells.

So he said that 20 out of 23 embryos are "developing nicely."

At this point, all of the embryos have been biopsied, and the cells have been sent to Shady Grove Genetics in Maryland to test for the translocation.

Remember that we have transferred the 5 frozen embryos from my 1st IVF in Pensacola to this clinic in Denver. These 5 frozen embryos have to be re-tested because the Pensacola fertility doctor didn't do the genetic test to check for the translocation correctly. Knowing that Jerry has a Robertsonian Translocation of the 13th AND 15th chromosomes, the Pensacola fertility doctor tested only for the 13th chromosome. So when he tells us that 8 out of the 17 embryos that we had at our 1st IVF were normal, in reality we have less than 8 that were normal. So that's why these 5 have to be re-tested. There's a question if the Pensacola embryologist had done the freezing correctly, because we did 3 frozen embryo transfer cycles with him. None of them worked. And when we insisted on an explanation, he told us that the embryo did not re-expand. In other words, they did not make the thaw. So if they didn't make the thaw, why put them in my uterus and give us a false sense of hope? I will never understand that. So we have 5 left, and if these 5 make the thaw (which no one thinks will be likely) then the cells will be biopsied and sent for genetic testing. Even though there is little hope for these 5 embryos, we have to try. We need closure.

Anyway, the embryologist said that a nurse will call us this afternoon with instructions about the embryo transfer that's coming this Saturday. I can't believe it! I'm actually going to make it to a fresh transfer!!

We are on cloud 9.

Details!

8am - Arrived at the fertility clinic. We waited for like 5 minues on the second floor waiting area. A nurse came out and got me. Jerry had to wait in the waiting area while the nurse prepped me for egg retrieval surgery. I was brought to a changing room where I changed out of my clothes and put on a hospital gown. I was told that I might want to keep on my socks, as it may be kind of cold in there for me. I wore booties over my socks. When I was done changing, the nurse put a warm blanket over me and walked me over to the prep room where I laid on the bed. She adjusted the bed to make me comfortable. Then she talked to me and told me exactly what she was going to do. First, she put the heart monitor probes on me. Then the blood pressure cuffs. Then the finger oxygen thing. In my chart, it says that I'm a hard stick (I only told them what the nurses in Pensacola told me - that my veins are small, deep, and they roll - Funny because everyone here at this clinic can get my blood with only one stick unlike in Pensacola where they have to stick me at least 5 times before giving up and getting the blood from my hand or wrist...ouch!). So she wrapped my left hand with a warm towel for a few minutes. When she took the towel off, she gave me a lidocane shot. She gave me a step-by-step play as to what she's doing and what it would feel like. Then she put the IV in and told me that I will feel a rush of cold going up my arm. Then she told me that the anesthesiologist and the doctor will talk with us before they wheel me back for surgery. The whole prep time took about 20 minutes.

The nurse brought Jerry back to where I was. I could tell that Jerry was very nervous, but so was I. I mean, I know it hurts him to see me having to go through this knowing that the fertility issue lies with him; but I was preparing myself for the worst to happen. In my mind, with my 1st IVF in Pensacola that doctor got 23 eggs and look how that turned out - I ended up in the hospital for 8 days! And now here, they're telling me that I have at least 25 eggs...well you know what I was thinking - I hope the hospital across the street is good!

The anethesiologist came in first and talked with us a bit. He just went over what we talked about the night before and asked us if we have any more questions. We didn't, so he said he's going to get my "happy juice" ready and left.

Then the doctor came in. She sat down next to the bed and looked very cheerful. She said, "It looks like we got a lot of eggs we have to get out." I nervously said, "Yep." She could tell that I was really nervous, so she said that they're going to do everything in their power to make sure that I don't hyperstim again. She assured us that she will aspirate every follicle that she finds and drain out all the fluid. Jerry asked her how long the surgery will take, and she replied, "About 15 to 20 minutes." Jerry told her that that's what the Pensacola fertility doctor said and it ended up taking more like 40 minutes. Then she said, "We do a lot of these and we're good at what we do." Jerry and I still thought it would take longer than what she said (but only because we had that one past horrible experience in Pensacola). I had to sign a consent form, and then she left to get ready for my surgery.

The nurse said that the anesthesiologist will be in shortly to give me my "happy juice." Within a minute, the anesthesiologist came back in and gave me my "happy juice" right before the nurse wheeled me out to the surgery room. All I remember is looking down at him giving me something in my IV and then the doorway and then I was out.

This part of story is from Jerry. He said that after I was wheeled to surgery, he was escorted back out to the waiting area and that someone from embryology would come and get him. He went to the bathroom and not longer than a minute after he sat back down in the waiting area, someone from embryology did come and get him. He was escorted down the hall and then into a room so that he could give his sample. He said that everything was "top secret" kind of stuff - he had to fill out the paper work and write his information on the collection cup. And then there was a red phone in there for him to use when the sample has been collected and that he was to stay in the room until embryology came to get him. He had to peronally hand the collection cup to the person (not leave it in the room until someone came and got it like with the Penscola fertility clinic) and the person signed that she received it. He even had to show ID and everything. I guess all that's good so there wouldn't be any mix-ups.

Then he went back to the waiting area. It was like 15 minutes before the doctor came out to talk to him. She said that there were 20 eggs and that they're still counting the tubes and that I did fine and that the nurse will go get him shortly. Then about 30 minutes later, the nurse came out and told him that I during the surgery I was wiggling around and the anesthesiologist had to give me more anesthesia and that I'm still groggy from that, so she wanted to let me sleep for another half-hour. And then she'll come get him after that. Then another half-hour passed, she went and got Jerry and brought him to my recovery room.

The first thing I remember after waking up was the nurse putting my glasses on me. Then I saw Jerry's worried face and heard the nurse tell him that I was a still a little groggy. Then she took my temperature, using one of those ear thermometers. Then she waited until I was more awake and told me that I would be feeling a little crampy, like menstrual cramps and to let her know if I would need tylenol. I told her that after my last hyperstim, I can handle any pain (as long as it wasn't the hyperstim pain like before). Anyway...I was a bit more awake and she moved me from the bed to the recliner. After I got settled in the recliner, she gave me ginger ale and some crackers. Not five minutes after I ate a couple of crackers and took a few sips of ginger ale, I was very nauseous. She gave me one of those barf buckets and Jerry held my hair as I barfed. She left us for a little while and when she came back and checked on me, she saw that I was still very nauseous and gave me more Zofran (the anti-nausea medicine) in the IV. She told me that it was probably due to the effects of anesthesia, but she went and asked the anesthesiologist just to make sure. Yep, it was most likely that I was suffering from the effects of anesthesia.

A little while later, the embryologist came in and talked with us. He told us that I produced a lot of eggs, 30 to be exact. Jerry asked him how many were mature, and the embryologist said that he won't know until the next day (Tuesday) with the fertilization report. He said that we will get a call Tuesday morning with the fertilization report. Jerry and I both reveled at the fact that they got 30 eggs from me, and I wasn't feeling the sharp pain (like a bunch of knives in my belly just slicing and dicing my internal organs) like with my 1st IVF. OMG - I thought it would kill me, that's how bad the pain from my 1st IVF was. But this time, it was so much different for me. I felt the occasional menstrual-like cramps and a little bloatedness and besides the nausea, that was basically it.

The nurse came back in and changed out one of my IV bags. Jerry asked her what it was, and she said that they give it (basically and electrolyte solution) to the patients who have the potential of developing OHSS (ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome). Jerry and I looked at each other and thought that the Pensacola fertility doctor should've given me that in the first place to try to stave off hyperstim. But then that's the difference between a crappy fertility doctor (Pensacola) and a world re-known one (Denver).

Then the nurse sat down and went over the discharge instructions and the medications I'm to take.

1. Estrace pill - 1X/day
2. Medrol pill - 1X/day
3. Prometrium vaginal suppositories - 3X/day
4. Vivelle patches - 4 patches on lower abdomen, change patches every other day
5. Tetracycline pills - 4X/day
6. Baby aspirin - 1X/day
7. Vitamins

She also told me to drink lots of fluid, especially Gatorade, and eat lots of salty foods. I don't like Gatorade, but I will drink it - anything to avoid hyperstim. She said that this may be the one time that it's doctor's orders to eat high salt foods. I usually don't eat high salt foods anyway, so it's hard for me to find something salty. We had to read the labels and choose the ones with the highest salt content.

After a few hours, we were given the ok to go "home" (the hotel). The nurse walked me to the changing room and waited for me to change. Then she put me in a wheelchair and wheeled me to the front of the clinic, where Jerry was waiting with the Yukon.

I had such a better experience with this fertility clinic than the one back in Pensacola. It's like night and day, that's how different my experiences between the two have been.

Now here's what happened with my 1st IVF in Pensacola. Got to the clinic in the morning and waited in the general waiting area. One of the nurses came out to the waiting area and put EMLA cream on my left hand. She said it will ease the pain of the IV going in. She left us in the waiting area for a few minutes. Then another nurse took us to the prep room, which was actually just an ultrasound room. She left the room so that I could change into the hospital gown, and I sat on the examination table (not a hospital bed like here in Denver). Then after a few minutes, she came back in to put the IV in. (BTW, the EMLA cream didn't work.) She had to try to put the IV in twice because she kept missing the vein. By this time, my sister-in-law arrived and was in the room with us. Then the doctor came in and talked with us a bit. He didn't explain anything, just joked around a bit. Then he left and the anethesiology nurse (not a doctor like here in Denver) and his wife (who was his nurse) came in and didn't explain anything, except that they will write on my right hand how many eggs were retrieved. Before I knew it, he injected something in the IV (I'm assuming the anesthesia) and I felt very dizzy. My sister-in-law later told me that as soon as he finished injecting, my eyes glazed over. Keep in mind that I was still sitting on the examination table. Then the husband and wife team helped me WALK down the hall to the surgery room. I remember the anesthesiology nurse helping me on the surgery table and strap my legs in the stirrups. I remember during the surgery, I wiggled and kicked the doctor on the side of his head and him telling the anesthesiologist to give me more anesthesia.

The next thing I remember is waking up on a couch (not a recovery room) in the ultrasound room. Jerry and Carol said that I woke up long enough to say "ow" and then passed out again. The doctor nor the embryologist came and talked with us after the surgery. The only person was the nurse, and she was trying to wake me up enough so that I could be released. They said that I was on the couch recovering for about 20 to 30 minutes. Jerry and Carol both said that they wanted to rush me out of the clinic very quickly, probably to make room for the doctor's next patient. Jerry and Carol both helped me WALK out to the car, walking past the waiting room where the other patients were waiting. Jerry said that they looked up at me walking in the shape that I was in and he said that the look on their faces were sheer terror...Like 'OMG what happened to her' kind of look. I left the Pensacola clinic in the most pain I've ever felt in my life and a number written on my right hand (23 for the number of eggs they retrieved).

It was such a horrible experience, totally different from the experience I just had here in Denver. In Pensacola, there was no follow-up as to how I was doing. It was Jerry that kept calling the doctor's emergency number, but no one picked up. The next day when we insisted on a follow-up appointment, the nurse said that she's sorry that she didn't get our message - Apparently, she said that she slept through her beeper. Disgusting. There's more to the story, and I'll probably talk about it at another time.

I'm ok!!!! (quickie update)

They got 30 eggs from me yesterday morning.
26 were ICSI'ed (meaning that they injected the sperm into 26 eggs).
23 fertilized. Today is Day 1.
We will know more results this Thursday, as to the quality of the embryos.

Tired, so I'll give more of a detailed update tomorrow. Thank you all for your prayers.