Peace, if not only for a moment

We woke up at 9am so that we could go to the 10:30am Mass. We usually like to get to church at around 10am, as we like to "prepare" for Mass. I usually start by kneeling and doing the Sign of the Cross and a prayer asking for forgiveness. Then I reflect on His Passion.

Jesus suffered both physically and mentally. He was rejected. Judas betrayed Him, Peter denied Him three times and the rest of the Apostles abandoned Him. Those who tortured Him not only wanted Him dead, but they also wanted Him to suffer. He endured horrendous scourging. At the praetorium He was publicly derided and sentenced to death by crucifixion. As a further humiliation, He was forced to carry the instrument of His execution. He was so weak, He could hardly walk and yet He dragged the heavy cross on His shoulder and fell with the cross on top of Him. He got up each time. After reaching the crest of Calvary, He received the nails into His hands and feet. When they raised the cross up, the nails in His hands held His body up. But His up-stretched arms began to squeeze His lungs and He couldn't breathe. So He had to push down on His crucified feet to raise His body to fill His lungs with air. He managed to do this for three hours. Finally, He had no strength left and He suffocated, and died, giving us His life.

Whenever I think of what Jesus suffered and died for us so that we may live, I no longer thought of myself - only Him. This brought me peace at the moment.

I will close this blog with a quote from St. Gemma Galgani.

“I wish that my heart could beat, that I could live and breathe only for Jesus, I wish that my tongue could utter no other name than that of Jesus; that my eye could see only Jesus; that my pen could write only about Jesus, and that my thoughts could soar to nothing but Jesus. I have often wondered where on earth there might be something on which I could center my love. But neither on earth nor in heaven do I find any such thing but only my beloved Jesus… I am the fruit of Your passion, Jesus, born of Your wounds. O Jesus, seek me in love; I no longer possess anything; you have stolen my heart…” - St. Gemma Galgani